Jealousy, it is one of the side effects of bringing another adult or child into your home.
Children go through a lot when their parents split and there are many fears that besiege them during this time.
As such, it is important that parents pay keen attention to their children’s behavior and try to curb the ill effects of jealousy. Leaving it unabated or otherwise not provide the necessary reassurance, can be detrimental to the health and well-being of your child and your family.
Especially in the long term where children do not process and deal with the psychological effects of coming from a broken home or dealing with divorce.
Alternatively, you might experience jealousy from another person, such as your ex-spouse.
Whether it is from unresolved feelings or having someone else raises their children, going into a blended family can cause complications for everyone involved.
Dealing with Jealous Children
Children demonstrate jealousy in several ways.
And there are a number of triggers for this behavior. One especially being that of a new baby coming into the household and possibly receiving all the attention, or an older child and the formation of a new blended family.
On the other hand, your child could just be jealous of an older sibling and not being more like them.
No matter the situation, you can use various strategies to minimize those terrible tantrums, quarrels and fights.
Upon learning how to deal with jealousy if you use these techniques to minimize those jealous fits then you will notice a more healthy and loving relationship between the siblings.
When a Baby Comes on the Scene
It is understandable that a child can get very upset if they are used to being the lone child and then another baby arrives.
They want all the attention and are used to getting it, but now they have to share it with someone else. Your child will hate it even more if you keep on blaming the baby for everything.
Like saying you have to feed the infant, change them, take them on appointments or anything else having to do with the newborn.
This only makes your child feel more resentful.
So, to prevent this occurrence, work out ways that you can give your child the attention he or she needs.
Either you or your spouse tries to find at least an hour in the day, where you can take the child out, play with them, complete an activity or simply have a chat. All of this depends on their age and preference, of course.
One of the important things to do when you think about how to fix a relationship and in maintaining the well being of your child, you must let them know you love them.
So you give them quality time.
You should also praise them and compliment them when you can.
Show affection. Give them hugs and kisses to reassure them.
When they are helping you with the baby, be dramatic when you thank and praise your child.
Say, “Oh my you are being a great big brother!”
“You are the best big sister!”
“Oh wow, I could not have gotten all this done today without your help!”
“I am so proud of how good you are at being mommy’s/daddy’s little helper!”
You can also give your child rewards later in the day, or read them an extra story.
Dealing with a Jealous Ex-Spouse
Jealousy between kids as well as current spouses and former spouses can be burdensome.
But just as how you have to use techniques such as more affection and attention, on your child, try to do so with your spouse as well.
Make the time you do spend together, very meaningful.
Lots of parents drift apart and forget to meet each other’s needs when a baby comes on the scene. That baby takes all the attention and then you are left with little or no time for your partner.
Even though maybe tired, there a couple things you can do.
Try to get the baby down at a set time each night. This should give you possibly two hours of adult time before bed.
Talk to your partner.
Find out how was their day. Discuss their challenges, their hopes, how they are adjusting and any number of issues that they might be dealing with.
If you are not the one staying home with the newborn, then do little things to help when you get in. maybe preparing dinner, doing the laundry or washing the dishes.
You know your spouse, you know your household, so help in any way that will alleviate some of the stress of taking care of a newborn all day.
Then spend some adult time together, just the way you used to before the baby.